A Requiem for My Traveling Pants

Superbe

I’ll translate to my “old boy friend” making me mad with his “getting old” Lewis 501, US bought every one or two years, choosed carefully with zip
(I prefer buttons) reminding exactly where he got them …
I know that secretly he hopes to wear his twenties’ size . Me too.

For Cinelli, I have a trick to get rid of our companions’cherish rags. Just I change their usual place, time to time ,expecting he will forget them. It takes years but sometimes it works …
Ok, It is not a respectful manner

Je vous embrasse
Eveline

You still write them beautifully, like columns, not like slap-dash blogs….you work too hard!

Oh, I feel for you, watching your beloved jeans floating out to sea on a flaming Viking pyre, or whatever Cinelli managed. I had a pair of jeans so beloved that I patched them, again and again, till they were pretty much three or four layers of patches everywhere, by which time I finally noticed that they were not only beyond hideous, but also way too hot and uncomfortable to wear anymore. I can’t remember what I finally did with them. Would have left them in a basket on the steps of an orphanage or convent had there been either one in Hermosa Beach at the time.

De-denimification is a painful experience many can relate to, and few can express with such eloquence. Thank you for another enjoyable read.

Your style of writing is always beautiful and makes one able to see exactly what was in your mind as you put your words down for all to see.

As always, Your column is its usual delight. I have yet to have a pair of jeans wear out. I have a small correction for your description of the fit of the jeans. They never cover your physiology, rather they hide your anatomy.
Stay well, and keep them coming.

This piece was fun to read as was the piece on AARP which I sent out to those of an age in my address book. You usually make me laugh out loud. I miss seeing you regularly in the LAT, but this is better than nothing.

At least you could stop wearing them because they were past their prime — unlike my favorite pair that I outgrew. Never the less, I enjoyed every fabulous meal and glass of wine that caused their passing on to someone slimmer than I.

Dear Al,

My treasured neatly stacked casche of Levi’s
have remained unworn now for at least five years.

It was about then in my life when my hip started to hurt almost continuously. The doctor of course said it was aging and probably a little arthritis, take two of something and don’t call him in the morning.
In other words, grow up and live with pain.

My little sportscar had to go because it was so uncomfortable for me to sit in the bucket seat. I really loved it. It was like another limb or extension of my physical self. that was a sad day when the new owner drove it away.

Anyway, in one of our treasure hunts at Costco my wife pointed like a German shorthair to the men’s clothing department at the front of the store. As you may know the clothing department consists of a squares of shipping pallets stacked waist high with piles of shirts, shorts, pants, jackets and pajamas.

Following her point my eyes settled on a stack of hundreds of “cargo pants” and choosing not to take the road of denial of spouse I rummaged through the mass and came up with one each of the available color choices in my size.

No sense in wasting water so I always wear new clothes out of the bag or in Costco’s case
out of the box. On day one of wearing my moss green cargo pants with at least seventeen pockets, the best being just beyond the reach of my fingertips on the side of each leg, where my wallet now resided, I became aware that something other than the pants was different. My hip was miraculously cured. No pain. I twisted, jumped up and down, bent over and twisted again. No pain.

So, my beloved Levis rest in peace on the shelf of the closet. The bulging wallet in the right rear pocket was the culprit. After years of sitting on that fat little leather dude it finally revolted and pressed on the hip a bit too hard and made me sell my sweet little car.

That is why my new pants are called cargo pants.

Ever yours,
Mitch

I was just thinking about you yesterday and so was happy to receive your latest blog. Wonderful to read anything and everything you have to say!

A great story Al. I felt the same way about an old pair of work dungarees when I came home from the Navy in 1946. Couldn’t bear to part with them. And I wore them until they looked so ragged that my Mother threw them out when I was away at college.

Keep on writing!

Richard T.

What a treat to read your writing again, Al. And what a wonderfully artistic group you Martinezes are. Lots of creative genes and good humor.

How do you manage ten years of intensive, world trekking use out of a pair of jeans, when I can hardly manage 6 months without even leaving the country?

Thank you for another great story!
Sybil

I’ll bet if you look on Ebay, they just might have a pair of your vintage jeans up for sale. Clothes don’t make the man. Unless there’s a huge tear in the… front and center.

Hot Dog! All is well in the Martinez household. I also buy two pair of jeans at a time but I put one away so that when I wear out or rip the first pair, I have a replacement ready. Glad to know Cinelli is taking care of you. Stay well, old friend, Don

Al: The neat stories in your blog allow me to share and compare memories with a fellow Depression Baby (you). My tennis outfits (total of two per 40 yr spans) graduated to house painting uniforms. Two of my sons stood at attention on the curb holding their right hands over their hearts suppressing a smirk as the tow truck hauled away my 72 Merc Colony Park Station Wagon in 1990.

Thanks, Ray M

To find more comfort, consider this effort and purchase part of the economic stimulus package !

Levis must be lovingly purchased at the Salvation Army thrift shop on Olympic around 10th in Santa Monica. You might find another pair of 540. There is a rough male kiss to new Levis that makes me nervous.

Cinelli is a SAINT. But you know that. Condolences on the departed loved one. Should Levis be loved ones? I mean they’re a pair, right? But they do seem like one entity - rather like a good marriage, I suppose.

Confucius says: “Man with fly in pants should avoid wife with fly swatter.”
Love the blog.

Milt

As always, your column is a delight. I don’t know where you find the words to describe the mundane, the everyday things of life, but no one else does it as well and I look forward to each new blog. The LA-by-god-Times made a huge mistake in not keeping your column. It brightened my day no end and it’s good we now have your blog to turn to.

I look forward to your next column!

Barbara

I so miss your column in the times. Your blog helps to alleviate the pain. Please keep them coming.

I”ve been missing you, Elmer. So sorry to hear about the demise of your Levis, but also happy to read your latest blog. The LA by God Times loss is our gain.

Poor Elmer… mourning the loss of his 540s! Reminds me of my sons, every time they had to chuck in a favorite pair of Levis. And when one style they particularly favored was no longer available? Reactions were worse than those of teen-aged girls without their makeup!
Bless Cinelli. I love that she calls you Elmer, as I took to it the first time you explained the sobriquet. May both of you continue to amuse and educate us through your wonderful writings. And may Cindy continue to gain in strength!

Missed you. Sounds just like my dad, wear the same old stuff. Good news about Cindy. Keep on writing

As you age, you certainly don’t lose you’re touch! However, you seem to be having a bit of a memory problem. When, many years ago, I first read about your pronunciation problems, leading a hard of hearing fellow to mess up your name, I recall it was “Alma Teenez”. Unfortunately, I can’t guarantee my memory. Sigh. Maybe your long suffering, and lovely (now that you’ve included a picture of her) wife Cinelli remembers for sure.

Dear Mr. Teenez Reading your random thoughts is like going home. Actually home during the
depression was never this comfortable.
We might possibly have a mutual acquaintance, a former sports reporter for the LABGTimes, I still correspond with Elliott Almond @ San Jose Mercury/News.
Great news about your daughter.

Don & Joan , parents of a survivor.

Elmer, I can relate. I have two things in my life that control the life span of my Levis. Number one, is my wife Karen, just as you have your Cinelli. Then there is my appetite. It could be my age, but I like the idea that my appetite is more important than my age. I probably could also add in my cardiologist, but he works off the results of my appetite, so I’ll just leave it at the two factors.
When the inevitable time does arrive, I usually am confronted with the same problem you were, in that Levi seems to enjoy playing with their numbers more than an IRS auditor. I eventually find the current number that surrounds the latest shape of my body, but the next time I am ready for the traumatic replacement safari, the Lords of Levi have eliminated my last numbered pair, or just to keep my cardiologist in vacation money, they have deleted the color or shade that I was comfortable in. I wonder if they get the newest numbers from my blood pressure that elevates during each endless Levi excursion.
As I read of your find, I did wonder if white was really an appropriate color for the environs of Topanga, or if you were now reuesting that Cinelli accompany you out in public so she could explain the ghostlike aberration beside her to the questioning local inhabitants?

It’s always a pleasure to read your blogs, Elmer. The story about your traveling pants remind me of an old pair of “gardening” jeans my husband finally insisted I “get rid of!” They were perfectly worn, even air conditioned and most of all, COMFORTABLE! I miss them.

Write on, Mr. Teenez!

Your message really is timely at our house. Lee has a terrible pair of Dockers that are ragged at the fly, ragged on the cuffs, with a hole on the behind. He says they are comfortable. I am struggling with myself to toss them while he isn’t looking. I threw away a leather jacket with ragged cuffs 57 years ago and he has never forgotten. So glad to hear from you.

I know exactly what you mean, I’ve got a number of items which are approaching decrepitude and disposal. I blame it more on the state of the economy and the lack of stores at which I lik to shop. At least you can wear Levi’s. For women, our anatomy precludes that pleasure for a lot of us.

You can always hope, that like mountains which have eroded, your pants will one day reconstitute themselves and rise again!

Thanks for an amusing break in the day.

So wonderful to know that you are there for us! I suppose it is inevitable that the LA Times will be going the way of your 540’s.
Please continue to be the ray of sunshine in our lives…we need you.

My fond praises to Cinelli for taking such very good care of you and your ancient jeans…. from a longtime majorly fan

What a riot!!! When I was younger I was amused at older people seeming to always wear the same clothing, now as I too blossom into late Autumn I like to wear a few items of comfy clothes. Perhaps, we recycle to where we came from, that is to say, I know a little girl aged 5 who never goes anywhere without her tattered, blue and bruised security blanket. My jeans can identify with the blanket.

Your point of view is a delight. I do hope Cinelli sprinkled some holy water on your jeans, before she said goodbye.

So great to read your lovely words again. Incidentally, the last blog with your granddaughter brought memories of reading your book where she requested to Dance Under the Moon. She certainly grew up. Thanks.

Glad to hear from you. Very glad to know that Cinelli is doing well.

Since I last heard from you I’ve celebrated my 91st birthday.
And I spend lots of my time reading now, instead of gardening, which has become too difficult for me.

Do you like cats? I’ve just read “Doris Lessing on Cats”. Wonderful–but definitely not the usual “aww, so cute!” story.
I recommend it.

My wife retires today. She’s spent her life caring for children … the last 28 years with HeadStart, the last 10 in disability services for what may be the largest HS operation in America. Now, she has only one real kid to oversee … me! Someone gave here a ribbon with a center buton saying ‘RETIRED’ which I talked her into wearing over the pix on her County ID card. We talked about having a glass of wine over conversation some years ago when I was at KVCR-TV. Now, with all of us retired we can make that happen. I hope she doesn’t look at me and decide I look as worn as your 540s and find a spot for my disposal. Kind regards, Don Leiffer

I remember when I was a younger trimmer man sitting in a tub attired in a brand new pair of blue jeans. The idea was that if you then let the jeans dry and shrink while still wearing them they would fit your body perfectly. This chilly bonding experience made the jeans seem more like a part of the family than an article of clothing.

After I married my wife mercifully disposed of a whole batch of these ragged beauties that I had been lugging around for years. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.

A great piece Al, thanks for the memory jolt.

Recently I noticed that my husband’s chinos were quite frayed at the bottom, as were the belt loops. Since they fit well (a fanny flatterer), I suggested we go to Macy’s and buy another pair. Alas, not that particular style. I did, however, find a similar one - so similar that it had distressed ragged bottoms and fraying on the belt loops already there. Price: on sale for $85.00! So we went to lunch and he wore his old chinos.

Thanks for the fun! And, wonderful news about Cindy.

Lola

White jeans with buttoned fly? A statement you’re retired, a gentleman of leisure, a bon vivant with time to sip his cold martini and ponder his memoirs and worry his wife? Poor Cinelli.

Al - how nice to read your always enjoyable column once again - and I hope you are getting used to the new jeans. Sometimes I am convinced that the clothing and shoe industry track my purchases and when they find me buying a spare of anything, they immediately stop making these. It has happened to me more times than I care to remember - or am I too just getting old?? Anyway, I sympathize with what you are saying and I have gotten into the habit of buying multiples of anything I REALLY like! Keep in touch!

I always enjoy your work, Elmer Teenez!! Sue

The button fly Levis were originally intended to slow down amorous miners by making it more difficult for them to undo their pants whenever they espied womenfolk. Is this also a problem in Topanga?

I cannot relate to your jeans story by any personal experience - but I loved
reading it nonetheless, as always. Can’t say I relate to Cole’s artwork,
however. Glad that you’re hanging in there, and writing. Keep up the good
work. Maybe I’ll drive through Topanga someday and look for the paper
there and your work. Already looking forward to your next blog.

I cannot relate to your jeans story by any personal experience - but I loved
reading it nontheless, as always. I can’t stay that I understand Cole’s
artwork, however. So glad that you’re hanging in there and writing. Keep
up the good work. Maybe I’ll drive through Topanga someday and look for
the paper there and get my Al fix. Already lookig forward to your next blog.
Is Cole the Nicole grandaughter, or was that someone else?

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old levis should not burn at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dyeing or the fray.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their jeans had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how once so blue
Their frail blue jeans might with patches dance anew,
Rage, rage against the dying of the stonewashed hue.

VERY HAPPY TO SEE YOU BACK IN PRINT AGAIN. WE’VE MISSED YOU. MY CONDOLENCES ON THE DEMISE OF YOUR JEANS. TERRIBLE BLOW! HOPE THAT YOU RECOVER AND CONTINUE TO KEEP US ALL ENTERTAINED WITH YOUR GREAT BUT SUBTLE HUMOR.

Thanks for another wonderful story and for sharing your daughter’s thought provoking art work. Garden pictures are beautiful.

Wonderful news about your Cindy!

Sorry about your travelin’ pants! They didn’t sound too old but I guess the vision of them was kind of sad.

Hell, Al, I just went to a 50’s party and wore my original saddle shoes. AND twin-set argyle sweaters. We are NOT rat packs; we just know REALLY GOOD STUFF!

Love to hear from you, it makes my day a little more filled w/sunshine!

Gloey

at last!
your email wnt to junk

in reference to your pants i thought the buttons were used because of ease of installation as opposed to a zipper

anyhow really happy to read u again,and your wife looks exactly as i imagined

bernice

Al, my Korean wife hates my dungarees. The’re not Levis, so the old Navy term fits, considering the beating they’ve had over the long,long hears. Bujt she thinks all middle class men(note the potential for snobbishnes) should wear suits and ties in public like I used to at the BO

Al, my Korean wife has never understood the desire of Amercan middle class men to look like cowboys, you know the working class. She thinks I an all men should wear suits and ties in public. Like I used to when we supped at the BOQ in Korea. When I toss my dungarees in the hamper, it’s weeks before I am able to find them. I like the term dungarees, just like those I wore in the Navy and these wore out just as fast. But the’re comfortable! I try to explain that word to her, but when it comes to appearance that just has no weight in the discussion. So I sympathize , Al. Can’t you just to down to the neares Thrift or Salvation Army. Might find a cheap encylopedia or Wordsworth and if you happen to find the right size in a sturdy pair of blue jeans, why, sometimes things just happen that way.. Al

‘t

Q

If you figure that for everyone of your appreciative fans who writes a comment (seven preceded me), there are a thousand who have read and enjoyed, but remained silent, then my heartfelt “thank you” for this charming anecdote, represents (at least) one thousand and one expressions of gratitude! Keep writing, and I’ll keep reading! Blessings always, SP

Your essay is a joy. Carl’s parody above is also a joy. Levis
Strauss should straighten up and fly right.

I just had to comment on your getting rid of old jeans. My husband does the same thing with old, old flannel shirts. When they are practically shreds in the back, I put a note on the back to the effect that I will put them in the washer one more time and then they go in the trash. He knows I mean it and does not put them in the hamper until he is really ready to part with that particular shirt. No other threats have ever worked. I agree with Julie above and I too miss your writing.

Thanks Carl! Those comments were laugh-out-loud funny! (I sometimes use the “rage against the dying of the light” line in my e-mails to Al.)

Elmer Teenez, I sympathize with your 540s loss. I went through that trauma with a pair of mocassins. Squeeze into your 510s and begin a new relationship and stay clear of Cinelli whle wearing them.

I sympatize, having endured the same upheaval with a pair of mocassins. Unfortuantely, Cinelli and most females are not aware that every rip and hole has a story behind it and should be treated with respect, and possibly reverence. Long life to all tattered jeans!!!
Ray

As usual, a winner! Where does genius begin to formulate perfect descriptions? That’s you, cuz. Keep writing, your fans are still looking forward to every line.

Hi Al, Really enjoyed reading about your 540″s. They were just like an old friend and hard to part with them.
They made you feel comfortable in your surroundings. New things are hard to adjust to. They just have to find a spot in your space.
My husband’s old clothes use to stand in the corner by themselves before he would part with them. He also did that with the oil in his car; never changed it until it stood alone in the garage and all his cars made the 200,000 mark.
Something to be said about old stuff including me. I am ready to stand in the corner by myself.
Thanks for keeping in touch.
Beth

You have my sympathy. Now retired I live in Levis. They are ragged, saggy, and comfortable. But………………Dr. Blue Jeans just a few doors east of Van Nuys Blvd., north of Ventura Blvd about a block and a half can do away with buttons and put in zippers for $20.00. My arthritis won’t let me button them any more. He’s also good a patching, sewing, nipping and tucking if you need it done - to your jeans. He’s just across the lot from In-N-Out.

Love your blogs as I did your columns. Monday morning just ain’t the
same. But like you advised us to do - I am keeping my LA by God Times
subscription to get the news - good or bad. Just wish you were still
a part of it.

Moderation? What does that mean? I love your blogs as I did your columns. Monday morning just ain’t the same. But like you advised us - I am keeping my LAbyGod Time subscription to get the news, be it good
or bad or more darn words about Michael J. Just wish you were still a
part of it. The paper, I mean. Keep blogging.

So enjoy reading your writing again. I can so identify with how we get attached to comfy things and can’t let them go. Love your humorous touch
and always look forward to your next offering. Haven’t heard anything lately about your cat. Still have him/her?

My husband wears an invisible shirt that is always of concern when he washes it. If not for the buttons, and a bit of pocket I fear it would dissolve and disappear down the drain with the rinse water.
When hubby retired he decided he had enough clothing to last him to the end of his days, ergo the shirt in question. Clean though it may be, it has reached the point of shabbiness that even a down on his luck beggar would refuse to wear it.
“Buddy” i said one day, “Either you’ve got to start pushing up daisies, or somebody’s got to go shopping!”